Worth It

I’m the one that goes through everything with my littles and sees everything with my littles.

I go through the violent temper tantrums even if they are about someone else and I get the blunt force of them. I go through the moments when one or both of my littles are full of sadness because someone at school is picking on them, someone in their lives let them down, or anything that makes them sad. I go through the moments when one of the littles is so mad, sad, and upset so my little just has a major blow out that includes punching, screaming, crying, throwing things, and everything else in between. I go through those moments about to pull out my hair and not knowing what to do exactly but realizing that when my little is acting out the most like that, it’s when my little needs the most attention and love. I go through my little crying asking why someone in her life doesn’t love her or like her. I go through severe separation anxiety with one of my littles who never wants to leave my side. I see all the uniqueness in my littles that makes them special and amazing but that others in school pick on them for. I see when my littles are starting to get worked up with anger or anxiety and have to step in as quickly as possible. I know my littles’ triggers so I try to prevent them as much as possible. I let my littles sleep in my bed with me and I hold them when they have a scary nightmare. I fix their boo-boos. I try to give them the life they deserve. I get my hair braided in little knots by my little that has a hard time falling asleep. I try everything in my power to help my littles before I have to put them on medications. I encourage my littles to do their best in everything. I’m that mom in the store trying to compromise with my little for the millionth time before I freak out. I try to encourage my littles to go to school and to make friends even though I want to scare all the littles that make fun and pick on my littles. I get food and any thing and everything else thrown at me when my little is having a complete melt down. Instead of checking under beds for monsters, I have to check to make sure the doors are locked completely and the windows are locked and check out the windows for bad strangers for my little. I have to get my little a emergency cell phone to help with anxiety even as little as my little is. I always have to try to keep it all together for my littles. I always have to try to keep a smile on my face for my littles, be positive for them, and try to keep it together for them.

Next time you see me with circles under my eyes, my hair absolutely crazy, me running around after my littles, hear me talking about putting my littles in a bubble to protect them from everything, watch me being so overly protective you wonder what is wrong with me, question yourself why I do what I do with my littles, see me watching my littles like a hawk, hear me speaking slowly to my littles before I freak out, or see me with tears in my eyes that don’t dare come out in front of my littles, smile and don’t judge me or my littles. I’m overtired, overstressed, and about to lose it but it’s all worth it. My littles mean the world to me.


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